Estrangement in 2024 has become a complex and widespread issue affecting families worldwide. The emotional toll that estrangement from adult children can take on parents is profound and often underestimated. As parents grapple with feelings of grief, guilt, and confusion, it is essential to explore coping strategies that can provide support and guidance through this challenging journey. This is why Nelson and I both have an individual therapist, as well as, attending family therapy.
Understanding the Emotional Toll
The experience of estrangement can evoke a range of intense emotions for parents. Feelings of heartbreak, rejection, and loss are common and can lead to significant psychological distress, as well as, cause trauma to the parents. Parents may struggle with self-blame, questioning where they went wrong or what they could have done differently. The uncertainty of not knowing if or when reconciliation might occur adds to the emotional burden, fostering a sense of helplessness and despair. It is our experience that each of these afore listed descriptions of the emotional struggle during estrangement are valid, and also vary between the two parents. They vary because each person in a couple are different, and react with different responses to the same estrangement.
Coping Strategies for Parents
1. Seek Support
2. Practice Self-Compassion
3. Set Boundaries
4. Focus on Personal Growth
5. Educate Yourself
6. Practice Mindfulness
Moving Forward
While coping with estrangement can be an arduous journey, it is crucial for parents to remember that they are not alone in their experiences. By implementing coping strategies and seeking support, parents can navigate the emotional toll of estrangement more effectively and begin to heal from the pain it brings. Remember, kindness towards yourself is key in this process of healing and acceptance. I am working on kindness towards myself and towards Nelson daily. We are in a grieving process and we have to remember that when dealing with each other.
The emotional toll of estrangement in 2024 is a significant issue that requires nuanced strategies for parents to cope effectively. By understanding the complexities of estrangement, seeking support, and prioritizing self-care, parents can navigate this challenging experience with resilience and grace. We recommend listening to The Reconnection Club Podcast on YouTube, by Dr. Tina Gilbertson. Her book, "Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child" is a terrific resource. We also recommend, "Rules of Estrangement," by Joshua Coleman. Nelson and I want to strongly encourage anyone going through estrangement with their adult child to seek a great therapist, and a great family therapist. We need to understand and learn to improve ourselves in order for reconnection to take place. Without changing ourselves, we cannot expect our adult child to want to cross the divide and meet us in the middle. If we do not do the self-reflection and research needed, then understanding the complexities of estrangement will not occur. It truly requires dropping your pride, being vulnerable and open to change in your mind, heart, and spirit.
Remember: you are worthy of love and understanding, even amidst the pain of estrangement.
Our aim for this blog post is to provide parents with adult children experiencing estrangement in 2024 with valuable insights and coping strategies to help them navigate this emotional journey. As we are experiencing an estrangement with our own adult child, and are working through our owns struggles during this season of our lives, we want this to be a place of safety and encouragement to other parents who find themselves in the same situation. Please know that we are sharing as we learn on a daily basis. We are charting a real time journey. Feel free to comment below, we would love to hear from you.
Comments